Secret. Dark Humour. Jay Chou.

It's hurt when u had try your best to help your parent but they still say you useless. i think there have no people will hate weekend as me. Monday to Friday study and my weekend not go out play! is help my parent with their business. 10years plus i doing the same thing and i didn't blame them because i told myself it's right to help them. i cannot see they work so hard and i go out play.

maybe there some people will say "chey, working only ma. i also got work" or "wow. so good AR, work for parent don't need go out find job" but no people know the hardness to help my dad. every minutes mind get scolded even i did nothing wrong. No off, No MC, if want go out on weekend must let him nag or scold first and the most important thing is cannot quit, no matter how i hate the job. get scolded, not happy, busy with study, tired, sick also cannot quit.

i know their hardness and tiredness, i don't mind to help them. i also know they dote me as they will try to buy whatever i want for me. But all i want is only some nice words from them. tell me they love me and show me they care for me. Not say me useless, blame me being not good enough. it's my wrong for didn't do good job but I'm a human! i will feel tired, i will fall sick. this two day my head pain again and i will feel blur blur. but they don't know, i think they also don't care.

last time no matter how my dad throw temper at his shop, he still will be a good father when he came home but now a day cause of some reasons, my dad scold me for nothing. NOT MY FAULT! just because he don't dare to scold her. why he want get himself into other people trouble then blame me? why his surname not lai? sometime feel just leave the house or even jump down from my house.

hard to believe, a happy go lucky girl have this kind of thinking? there's pain inside my laughing. if i not that cheerful, maybe i have gone crazy...